Blunt

I mean it, if not I'm gonna throw a Nadine at you.

Source: http://fuck-up-one.tumblr.com/

It's fucking pointless so why waste my breath to tell you how I feel?

Love Rachel*

Half Naked

This shot is super cool.

Source: http://weheartit.com/entry/17140781/via/pmaybe

Hey hey how was your Saturday? Mine was actually pretty awesome, for the first time! I had to perform for Maybank today, we did a perfect routine. Thank God (: That's all I did other than cry and laugh. I feel unproductive though ): Not really in the mood to study, I just feel like binding my scrapbook. I'm not sure whether I have any other homework.

Today's pretty fun. Really had a good time out with my friends :D Maybe I'm just going to watch a movie to get my mind off things. Yes, my head is still full of depressed shit.

Pucker up.

You're a fucking hypocrite, you know that? You manwhore.

Love Rachel*

Mouthgasm

make me sandwiches like that every morning and I'll love you forever.

Source: http://perfectum-corpus.tumblr.com/post/27201330044/healthy-funny-delicious-colorful-sandwiches

Hey hey, so there was this cheerleading competition recently that was held in Japan. Team Malaysia came back with one bronze for Co-Ed Partner Stunt which are Coach Kai Ling & Coach Dickson and another bronze for Co-Ed Premier level 6! Congrats coaches and cheerleaders! You all made Malaysia proud. Anyway, my coaches bought me snacks from Japan. The green tea kit kat and the other biscuit with chocolate fillings were so effing delicious. They were like SEX IN YOUR MOUTH. If you ever get the chance to go to Japan make sure you buy green tea kit kat. It's fucking mouthgasm man. UGH! I have two more left. teehee.

sex sex sex sex

Back to boring school life, sorry I didn't update my blog yesterday. Wednesday is my busy day so I always don't have the time to blog when I get back. (Who reads my blog anyway? </3) Plus my checkpoints are coming so I have to be on full study mode if not I'll be far behind. I told you before, my study mood just kicked in. My moods are really unstable. Busy busy busy me ):  OH OH! HAPPY 14th Birthday GOOGLE. Without you, I'll be the dumb child I was. Thank you so much for all the information (': You are God's awesome creation (':

School was nothing today I guess, nothing much in my life. Meh, I'll get back to my positive self when my exams are over alright? :D See you all soon. OH, I'm wearing my pyjamas now. Sports theme today. Chelsea jersey for the top and MSSM track pants for my bottoms ;) Jerseys are so comfortable when it's cold. Have a goodnight everybody!

It feels like we're just friends now

Love Rachel*

It's the truth

You said it kiddo.

Source: http://forever90s.tumblr.com/

How was your day? Late update I know. Had a busy and confusing day. When I say confuse I mean that my mind is very unorganised. When I was in school this afternoon, I had a huge list on what I have to do but then when I get home and am ready to list it all out. Nothing comes in my head, seriously. I should've written it down but I did not have the time in between lessons.

Good news is my studying mode has finally kicked in. Yes, finally. I only have 20 more days until checkpoints. I really hope I can finish up all my notes in the 20days, 19 actually because I'm not doing anything today. Ah well, I better catch up with everyone else. I'm still so far behind, I don't want to be the loser here ): Gotta be stronger and have to definitely work way harder than before. I cannot imagine myself studying my ass off when it comes to the O levels exam. It's such a huge deal and I cannot blow it all away because of my laziness. If laziness didn't exist, everyone in the world would achieve damn a lot and be super productive. If only laziness wasn't a part of me. It's a battle now, between laziness and I. A tough tough battle and I'm going to make sure I. WILL. WIN. Only winners can survive, losers can't. Yes, I'm a very competitive person but only towards myself. I compete with me, myself and I. If I can overcome myself, I can overcome anything else. The biggest challenge is always yourself. Fight yourself before fighting others. Always remember that! I feel super motivated now! I'm gonna win this battle no matter what >:D Bring it on me!

To all of you out there, going to face any major examinations or just dealing with life. Best of luck, remember, fight yourself first. If you can fight the demon in you, you can definitely overpower the demons in the world. Make sense? Just trying to get the mood going! But for tonight, go get some sleep because you need your puny brains tomorrow. (Well mine is puny :b) No, I shouldn't say that, must get rid of negativity. I shall remember that! Goodnight everyone! Study hard but rest as well (:
Now put on a smile and sleep, you are so ready!

PS: I think my grandpa watches tennis because of the bouncing boobs.

How am I going to bring myself to tell you?

Love Rachel*

Baby Cries

Fuck it. YOLO!!!!! So want to do this one day!

Source:http://queenlanaa.tumblr.com/

Hello hello! Monday Blues~ I didn't want to go to school today but something made me go. It felt like it was important so I had to go to school but at the end, nothing important happened in school. I could've stayed at home and relax. Grr... I should listen to Coach Jozef more, he always tell me not to follow my instincts. I guess he is right. I shouldn't. I guess today was alright. I have to admit Monday is kind of my favourite day of the week but after Sunday of course. It's because I have no training on Monday or any sort of tuition. WOOH. I know everyone hates day but I love Mondays. Screw the rest of the days of the weeks. 

I'm so exhausted, did way too much typing for the stupid BM scrapbook, thank the Gods we're not doing individual. I. WILL. DIE. Thank God for Sie Min & Nadine's help (: I'm currently scanning through tumblr and there's like a sudden wave of posts of couples kissing. Oh come on, not when I'm going through a rough time with my boy, jeez /: Oh well... I feel happy when I see other couples, it touches my heart. We all have a place in someone's heart, right now, we just have to look for them. When you find that very person who has your heart, you'll know it. Right now, just overcome all the obstacles and you'll get to the person who's holding on to your heart!

I'm gonna stop typing, I need to excrete some waste :b HAHAHA. Good day everyone!

Jammin' to Maroon 5!
PS: Dear The Script, Christian Grey does not approve of cheap bottles of wine or champagne. 

Love Rachel*

Reminders

Just what I need, to live in a different universe.

Source: http://inspirinquotes.tumblr.com/

How was your Sunday? Mine was pretty boring... I was suppose to do my incomplete Mathematics paper and clean my room but I did not. As usual. Always making empty promises to myself but I always take my promises seriously with other people. Like they say, "Don't make promises when you're happy and don't break them when you're mad", so when do we make promises then? We can't make promises when we're sad because we might say, "I was too sad to think" or "Too drunk to think, I didn't know what I was talking about" and all that kind of bullshit. So when do we actually make our promises? When we're neutral? Is it possible to feel neutral? Feelings flood our body and mind all the time, they don't stop. They travel all over you, it's always a busy traffic in you. Don't you wish one day, all your feelings would stop driving and take a break right? Would you feel that the weight has been taken from your shoulders? I guess I would. Sometimes I just wish I was emotionless, feel nothing. Nothing. Just at times. 

Guess what!? I got my second piercing on both ears! I'm very thrilled! I know it's not a big deal, blah blah blah but it is to me! I was suppose to wait 'til I was 18 but I manage to persuade my mum. Thank the Gods for my persuasion skills but I'm kinda upset that she doesn't allow me to pierce my ear flaps. She's afraid I go blind or something because they nerves are connected to the eye. It can't be that bad can it? I'll probably go google on how many people went blind from piercing their ear flaps. Some people don't like piercings or getting tattoos because they believe that you're destroying a beautiful body you have there which I kind of have to agree. Some people are gifted with a beautiful body but they are covered with tattoos which is kinda sad but it is their choice. I'm not sure whether in Christianity tattoos are allowed, are they? My dad might kill me if I get one but I'll be eighteen by then ;) Shush! My secrets.

I'm done with the 50shades trilogy by the way and I have to say I'm very happy with the book (: I'm still not sure whether it's better than Percy Jackson series but I guess both series are just as good. I would want to live Christian Grey's life but it's kinda impossible. Well it is, that character isn't even alive! Sucks huh? But at least Adam Levine is alive ;) HAHAHA! Me and my fangirl-ing shit. I guess that's about it.

Gooodnight eveyone!

Love Rachel*

Too Late

Is this the road to my happiness?

Source:http://antarctics.tumblr.com/post/27128354482/hungry-for-a-salty-twist-by-no-rest-for-the

Hey everybody, man, it's the weekend already. So soon eh? I really didn't expect the weekend to come so soon but I'm grateful for it! This blog is really dead, haha! Even my friends don't visit it anymore, oh well ): I don't blame them. My "conditions" have really distant me from my family, boyfriend, friends... Sigh.

I just want to say thank you to them who took a lot of effort to tolerate me and withstand my mood swings. Trust me, my mood swings are really bad. Worse than the normal moodiness. Ask my family and my boyfriend. HAHA. I don't like getting moody either but when my feelings get to me, it really gets to me... It's so terrible... I really appreciate everyone who did their best and is still doing their best to tolerate me. I can't thank them enough especially my boyfriend, Nadine & Sie Min who keeps putting up my endless shit. Love you <3 

Did you all know H&M opened in Malaysia? It's something like Forever 21. I've always hear people talking about it and making a big deal out of it. Hope I get to go there tomorrow to check it out. One of the girls spent like RM800 in that freaking store. What the hell right? Are the clothes there really that nice? Hope it's just as good. But wouldn't everyone be wearing the same thing if everyone went to that shop? Hmm...

Praying for a good weekend ahead. Checkpoints are near and I am still not in the studying mood yet :x Oops. I seriously hope the feeling kicks in sooner or later... If not I'm screwed big time. I got my report card back today and obviously my mum isn't happy with my results but she never scolds me because she knows I can do better. Even though she didn't scold me, I still feel really bad. All I want to do is make my mum proud. Sorry mummy ): I don't wanna disappoint you...

Am I ready to let you go?

Love Rachel*

Is it my period?

I don't know what's wrong with me, my mood is really messed up this time. I seriously have to chill and think wisely. My 50 shades trilogy is about to come to an end and I'm super upset about it, it makes my heart ache. You would probably think, "Dude, it's just a book, chillax." I know I'm overreacting, it's crazy. I just can't help it, sigh </3 I just want to read about the characters' lives forever. Their love, their secrets, their stories. Why can't my life be like theirs? Wow, I'm super duper sad. Shit. I'll get over it, sooner or later. My posts will be short for these few weeks I guess, I'm just not me anymore.

Before I go, I WENT TO FUCKING MAROON 5'S CONCERT YESTERDAY and I WAS RIGHT AT THE FRONT IN FRONT OF FUCKING SEX GOD ADAM LEVINE. What an amazing experience, I don't know what to say. You have to be there to feel it you know. Be there to see it. ADAM LEVINE IS SO HOT. He's probably the closest and best option to be my Christian Grey. Sigh. I took a lot of awesome pictures and stuff during the concert but I'm too lazy to plug in my phone so I'll just take awesome shots from the internet (:

I guess that's about it y'all.

LOVE MAROON 5 & CHRISTIAN GREY <3

Love Rachel* 

Breakdown

It's only so much I can hold,
So much depression I can keep,
So much pressure I can face,
So much stress I can take.
But to know I can't be happy again,
Makes my heart ache.

I just want my happiness back. Give me back my book. I just want this torture end.

Love Rachel*

(Blogged from iPhone)

Sad

Source: http://verticalthings.tumblr.com/post/23558716863

Summarises what I'm going through right now.

I'm not sure whether I'm sad because of a few things.

Or it's because sadness just suddenly wants to attack me.

All my emotions are mixed up.

They're in a mess.

Someone screwed me up.

"I'm fifty shades fucked up."

-Christian Grey-

(I only quoted him the last sentence, credit given)

Love Rachel*

My Escape.

Christian Grey is a fucking sexy name.

I'll go hunt for my Christian Grey.

Blogging this early? yeap, I'm at home. Came back early from school this morning because I wasn't feeling well and I have a lot of things in my mind. Just needed a time out. 

Reality sucks now. I always thought of life in a positive way. Always 'seizing' the day. Well screw all of that now huh... The only way I escape reality is by reading books. I get lost in books all the time. I put myself in the character's position. Living different lives as I read different books. When I stop reading, I'm back to the normal world we live in. I'm currently reading the Fifty shades of Grey trilogy. The books are bloody awesome. I'm down to the last book and I'm pretty darn excited. I don't want the story to end though, I just wanna keep on reading and reading... This series probably will take me the shortest time to finish. My favourite series would actually be Percy Jackson but I'm not sure if 50shades of Grey might win over. I won't judge until I'm done with the last book. Sigh </3 I overreact a lot when it comes to books. They always make me look at life differently and yeah, they make a huge impact on me, depending on how good the story line is.

 From what I heard, they wanted to make a movie for 50shades of Grey. People on tumblr are like making their own dream cast and stuff like that, pretty understandable. I prefer the story to just stay in the book instead of making a movie out of it. If they do, I hope it doesn't turn out like The Percy Jackson movie. Did you watch it? It sucks, it's so different from the book and so are the characters. Pissed me off, they spoilt such a good story. Well if they are going to choose someone to act as Christian Grey... I would pick.... This is tough... I don't know actually. Not easy to fit in such a difficult and sexy role. *SF moment* Screw that, but Blake Lively would make a good role as the best friend and Alex Pettyfer would make a good Elliot Grey. I really hope they don't make a movie out of it. But it's not my choice, oh wells... *fingers crossed* Hope the book ends well. Sigh.

How am I going to tell you how I feel?

Rambles rambles rambles. 

Love Rachel*

Mysteriously Hot.

Currently blogging in my car because I would probably be too lazy once I get home. No colourful post today. Boohoo ): I'm just gonna compose a poem? I'm not sure whether it will turn out as a poem but whatever. Enjoy (:

We want to fulfil our cravings,
But we want to be tempted at the same time.
We don't want to be lied to,
But we are too afraid to know the truth.
We have so many questions,
But do we want it to be answered?
We all crave for attention,
But we call others "attention seekers"
We complain 'til our hearts content,
But we do nothing to change it.
We want to love somebody,
But we're too afraid to get hurt.
We are always impatient,
But we want to create the suspense.
You want the world to accept you,
But you can't even accept yourself.

We humans demand a lot,
But in the end,
What the fuck do we really want?

Love Rachel*

Sidecut

That's what we all are right?
Source: flickr.com

How is you? :D The weekends are here! Woots! No wait, I'm just looking forward to Sunday. Tomorrow is busy day *groans* In my head, I'm currently rambling about how bored I am with the activities I'm involved in. You guys heard enough. But I'm just so bloody bored.

Anyway, school was alright today. My Maths teacher has really bad mood swings. Sometimes, he is like super fun then the next time he's a grumpy old man. He's like leading us on. It's so irritating. Just because you're in a bad mood that doesn't mean you can take it out on your students. Ish. That's the thing with teachers, just because they have the higher authority that means they can do whatever they want to the students. If we try to fight back, we'd get screwed because the principal will always believe to the teacher. Assholes.

I'm really exhausted so today's post will be short. (Not like it ever did matter) Happy Weekend!

Love Rachel*

Pumpkin & Chicken

Source: http://chocolovestotoro.tumblr.com/

"The world does not change me....

…I change the world. 

The world opens my eyes to possibilities. 

It unlocks new avenues of thought.

And the more I learn, the more I want to know.

So I suppose it changes my perspective.

But. 

It has not changed my heart.

It has awakened my mind."

Source:http://feralhuman.tumblr.com/

How's everyone? (No one's gonna answer me anyway, this blog is as good as dead) Sorry I didn't update yesterday (Not like it mattered) was really busy and stuff.. In a really bad mood now, I'm just so frustrated with everything.

I'm bored with my life, I really am. I'm sick of repeating the same routine and I've been doing the same thing for 3 freaking years now. (Yes I'm in a bad mood, so I'm gonna bloody ramble til my heart's content) I just want to stop all my activities and do the things I've always wanted but I can't because stopping everything involves a lot of time and people. Sigh. I don't want things to be scheduled all the bloody time. I want to be able to do my sports whenever I want. I'm not saying I don't like the sports I'm doing. I'm okay with ballet and gymnastics but cheer is boring the shit out of me. But I can't quit because I've been given a huge responsibility. I want something unexpected in my life, I don't wanna feel, "Oh cheer, gym and ballet tomorrow. What's new?" It's just so boring. Three years already and it's gonna be the fourth year of the same shit over and over again. Some of my cheer friends wouldn't understand because they only have one sport to commit to, that's why they love cheer so much. I want a freaking adventure, I wanna explore. I don't wanna wake up, go school, do sports, go home, tuition, sleep. It's the same thing!!!! (I know I've been repeating this a lot) I'm just so bloody sick.

I'm starting to get lazy and I'm starting to not care anymore. I'm too lazy to do my homework, I don't care about it. I'm lazy when I do my sports, I don't even care if I'm not strong. I just wanna get over it. Thinking of all of this just makes me upset and frustrated. I need a change, I want a change but it's just not that simple when my life is always so busy. Sorry about the ramble.. Just screw everything for now.

No effort, no love. 

Love Rachel*

How I really feel.

For a few months now,
there's this lump of depression in me,
right next to my heart.
I'm not exaggerating, I can actually feel it.
Strange.
It feels like it is impossible for me to be happy anymore.
Yes, I can still be happy.
But not how I used to be able to.
When I'm happy, I will feel the depression in me.
It makes me sad again.
My feelings start to mix.

Anger.
Sadness.
Happiness.
Hatred.
Neglected.
Forgotten. 
Confusion. 
Love.

They mix to become a liquid.
An undrinkable one.
It was made to puzzle your mind.
To believe you're happy but sad at the same time.
To make you love but hate someone.
To make you angry and then forgiving.
I now suffer the consequences.
It overtakes my body and is in total control.

I don't know what to feel.
I don't know what to do.
I'm so lost, so so lost.
I'm not myself anymore, I know it.
This isn't me, not me at all.
It's like someone took over my life
and I'm fighting to take back what's mine.
My feelings.
My life.

My feelings start to change.
Do you care about me?
Or is it just me?
Are my feelings fading away?
Or maybe you're not the one.
You'd said you fight for me.
But what I feel is emptiness.
Did you take a part of me?
Cause I can't find it anywhere.
This puzzle is waiting to solved.
So please, just give it back.

Everyone is leaving me.
Everything is gone.
I might be in the most crowded place.
But I will still feel so alone.
So far away from everyone.
But in reality, still so close.
This lump of depression won't leave.
It really needs a place to stay.
Please, I beg you.
Get away from me.
I just want my happiness back.

Love Rachel*

Don't let it end this way

You were created to love and be loved. You were meant to live life in relationship with other people, to know and be known. You need to know that your story is important and that you’re part of a bigger story. You need to know that your life matters.

We live in a difficult world, a broken world. There are good people. And there are bad people. You need to know that rescue is possible, that freedom is possible. You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story.

Source: http://alexanderssskarsbrow.tumblr.com/

http://voldemortsn0se.tumblr.com/

The most unexpected thing happen in school today and that is, a senior attempted suicide. From my first sentence, you now know what I'm going to talk about. Suicide. I do not know why he attempted suicide and I will not leak out information about him.

Let's begin. Today, I was going to the toilet in the middle of class when I realised everyone was staring at something from the corridor. Me, being curious and busybody asked a girl from Theta what was happening. She told me there was a boy who was attempting suicide. I was shocked and ran to see the boy sitting at the edge of the wall? (not sure what you call it but you get my point). From what I heard, he had already been there for awhile and refused to come down.

I will tell you what I think. First of all, I'm against suicidal. (I'm not sure whether it's possible, let's just put it this way. I don't think suicide is right) Certain people suicide because they have a lot of problems and they just wanna stop living because they think all the problems would go away. Partially true, you get to escape all your problems because well, you ain't breathing anymore. To me, I think it's wrong running away from your problems through death. It's just so wrong. There's an answer to all problems (except math problems), it is just whether you are willing to solve them or not. Yeah, certain problems take an eternity to be solved but it WILL be solved in the end and suicide definitely ain't the answer.

I do not mean to offend anyone but I think suicide is kind of selfish. At the moment, the person would feel like his problems are never gonna go away, he feel as though the whole world is against him and he is all alone. What about your loved ones? Your family members? Do you wanna hurt them by leaving this world ? You have to know that there is always someone out there who cares for you and loves you so very much even though you don't know it.

 Lastly, people shouldn't suicide especially for reasons like girlfriend or boyfriend stuff. And again I don't mean to offend anyone but really? It's kinda silly you know, you're throwing away your life because some douchebag cheated on you or he/she doesn't love you. Through suicide, what are you trying to prove? You jump, you gone. He/She would probably feel guilty for awhile but after that you gone. They move on. So are you seriously going to risk your life cause of that? As for people who wants to attempt suicide because you're being bullied or because you're super depressed. No silly, you have to learn how to fight in life. Fight the bully, don't suicide because of him because of your depression. NO. You have to man up and fight life, that's why you're living. You were the freaking sperm who won the freaking race and life right now is your ultimate challenge! Complete this mission and end it with pride. That's what you have to do. It's not over until life admits it's defeat, you got it?

Everyone, think again before you want to do something silly. It's not worth it in the end and you can never get the opportunity back. Think super super hard. Yes, life is tough but no matter what, fight it because this is what you're here for. Life is your challenge. Oh and did you know today is Suicide Awareness Day? Ironic huh? I shall dedicate this post to people who have passed on through suicide and had made suicide attempts. 

I hope you all learnt something from my post and please understand the message I'm trying to send out. No, I do not intend to offend anyone. I just think everyone needs a wake up call.

PS: Write "love" on your hand to show people who wants to suicide that they are loved and cared about

Think Hard and Think Smart
Love Rachel*

Do nothing day.

Kiss someone and live life. 

I would put a picture of me and my boyfie but I don't want anyone getting disturbed now, do we ;)

Source: http://burnedcigarettez.tumblr.com/

Hey hey, how was your Sunday? (It rhymes) Today was pretty boring for me, I seriously need more adventure in my life. Went for breakfast this morning and just watched community and running man the whole afternoon and evening. Had instant noodles for dinner because my mum was too lazy to drive out. I was just so dead bored.. OH! I bought six new books because my dad got back :b I can't wait to read 'em! I honestly don't know what to talk about, it feels like my post is getting shorter and shorter everyday. That's bad ): I'm just scared I might get the feeling of being too lazy to update my blog. Obviously I don't want that if not I made this blog for nothing.. Let me think of something educational to post. Hmmm... AH! Let's talk about flaws!

Everyone has flaws that's why the term "Nobody's Perfect" came about. All of us have friends right? And they are likable but at times they might have an attitude you don't like or they do something that gives you a bad impression of them. You may not like that side of them but they are still your friends yes? You as well have a flaw and there will be someone who won't like it. Sometimes my friends tell me I'm mom-ish.. I have to agree with that although sometimes I find it quite offending but it's a fact. Some say that, if I'm not the one who's gonna be mom-ish, then who else will be right? Some people dislike me for that and some people like me for that. (I'm not sure whether I'm still talking about flaws but just keep reading) Everyone is gonna have flaws and just because someone doesn't like it, that doesn't mean you have to change it you know. Get what I'm saying? In this kind of society, you can't please everyone. It's impossible. (No, do not give me that nothing is impossible shit) You be nice, people call you fake. You be smart, people call you nerd. That kind of thing. So at times when you think you're letting everyone down, well you're not because someone out there appreciates your flaws (: You can't please the whole world.

There educating enough? Man, I need more interesting stuff in my life so I can blog more things. Oh well, at this point, I've got to say that I'm pretty bored with my life. Everyday I do the same shit over and over again. Why can't my life be more fictional? Battle mythological creatures, run away with prince charming or be a totally sexy vampire. If you didn't know, after reading all my vampire-related books (NO, it's not frigging twilight that I'm reading. It's too bloody thick) I think vampires are uber sexy and cool and sexy so yeah, I wanna be a vampire. 

Can't you see? Our feelings are fading...

Bite me.
Love Rachel*

Perseverance

Happy Birthday sister! That's me on the left and my sis on the right.
Yeap, we're on the same cheer team :D 

Sorry for the late update! It's been kind of a long day for me. Today's busy day ain't very busy. The usual gym class in the morning, I went to gym and left cheer early because I had to go help Ms Alexis to do ushering for the Cultural concert but found out later that she didn't need our help. Oh well, the concert was alright, a bit boring, only certain performances were nice. Not being offensive, am just stating my opinion. (It is my blog after all). In one of the performances, I think it was the TaiChi one? Yeah, there was one girl, she kept putting her head down when she was performing and I have to say, it was pretty darn distracting. I think she just didn't want people to look at her but guess what kiddo, you're just drawing more attention to yourself.

Other than that, it's my sister's birthday today! Happy Birthday little sister! I hope you're enjoying your birthday and I wish all the best (: Although we argue a lot but I still love you very much and no one can ever replace you! Everybody wish my sister, if not I chop you with my butter knife. Yes, I can kill people with a butter knife. I'm glad my sister is enjoying her birthday unlike me. I had the worst birthday this year. It was terrible, I broke down like millions of times. It was terrible. although I received gifts and yes I was really grateful for them but I felt super alone that day... I was just so upset. Meh, terrible terrible birthday indeed. Forget about what I said. I'm just having so many things in my mind lately I think I'm going to go mad! Super short post today but thanks for dropping by (:

I don't think you feel the same way about our friendship like how I do.

Love Rachel*

Eyes of a Demon

Enjoy the ride~

Source: http://www.andrewbreitel.com

The weekend is here, what did I tell you? Pretty quick eh? To me this week has past super fast which is good, I can't wait for Sunday to be here! I'm currently having a bad sore throat, my voice is super rough (not like it already isn't). It's so itchy I want to scratch my throat so so badly. Ugh, why now?

The planning for my class' trip is actually going pretty well! Settled all the payment, so now we just need everyone to pay up! Thank God we managed to settle everything by today, I don't want things to keep dragging on. There were some bumps here and there but we pulled through! After everyone pays, it will be official! Can't wait can't wait! Last year was fun and I hope this year will be just as fun (: I just want to make the last year with my class a good year. I will miss my class so damn much. I know I can't please everyone of them but I just want my class to enjoy the trip.

Like last year, my friends and I seriously went through so so much trouble planning the trip because first of all we were inexperience, secondly, everyone kept complaining and third it was very difficult to get everyone to co-operate. I was really worried the trip wouldn't work out but guess what bitches! It did :D I seriously felt so happy because the trip was awesome. You know that feeling when you put so much effort into something and you go through so much shit for it. At the end, BOOM, it all works out  and that feeling when you finally accomplished what you needed to. It's a damn great feeling to feel despite all the shit I was put into. I honestly just want the best for my class even though they might be annoying sometimes but I love you my Zeta Classmates (: I'm just praying and praying it all works out, we want nothing to go to waste right? I'm just uber excited! But the bad thing is, I do all the planning during lessons which is bad because I either end up not paying attention and stuff. I'm not the kind who can wait, especially when it comes to planning something exciting! I'll get too excited and impatient and just get it done with. Typical me! What can I do? The adrenaline won't leave me! I'm very excited now as I type this post! Oh my :b

Nothing much to talk about, usual boring routine in life. Guess what, tomorrow is busy day. Shit. Hate busy day, I'm so sick of it. I ask myself why the hell did I get into all of that in the first place when I can just stay home and sleep in. Sigh. Oh, any interesting games to suggest for my class trip? Please leave a comment or type on the cbox! Suggestions would be appreciated!

Am I a stranger to you? I'm your girlfriend, damn it. 

Dinner time!
Love Rachel*

I tried.

I could eat them all day. Fresh & Chewy prawns. 

Source: http://chickenvuggets.tumblr.com/

Whaddup? I have 30 minutes to do a post before I have tuition so let's go! The usual question, how's school? Mine was alright I guess but I was extra hyper today for some reason. After that I got really tired ): Drained all my energy on a stupid dance! Currently planning the class trip with a few friends and my God it's so stressful. Last year's planning was super messy but we had a lot of time unlike this year. Next month is already our class trip so we got to get our shit together! Praying my class will co-operate but seriously it's kinda impossible but not impossible. Makes sense? I hope the class trip will work out, last year worked out too and I have to say it was awesome (: Super excited, haha! Screw checkpoints :b

I just had dinner and I thought of the kind of food that I really like and I really hate. I get really weird thoughts when I eat or sometimes I don't think at all because I'm so focused on the food. I seriously shouldn't talk when I eat, so unladylike. HAHA! Today's lunch was Nasi Lemak and I kinda stuffed everything in my mouth and talked at the same time. My bad /: I'll watch my table manners next time. Shevanti sat in front of me so she must be very disgusted. Eeee... Back to the food thing, I really hate pineapples! I hate 'em, I know it's sweet but I just don't like it. I think it's because of the texture? I wouldn't eat/drink pineapple in any form. Pineapple itself, pineapple on pizzas, pineapple juice? No No No! I cannot take it, I'm sorry if I offended pineapple lovers but I just can't! I dislike eating the tomato itself but I do like ketchup, tomato in soup and yada yada. Same goes to celery, I hate eating celery but I can eat it if it's in soup. Do you find it weird? haha! But I do love food very much although I'm very cautious about my weight. At times, I just don't give a shit and eat my heart out :D Again, if you're gonna eat your heart out, make sure you burn it off or something. Don't just eat and not do exercise, it's bad!

Almost time for tuition! Oh no, I get distracted to easily. People tell me I have an attention span of a peanut. You'll be thinking, "But peanuts don't have an attention span." EXACTLY. I just focus whenever I should and whenever I can (: Sorry for the not very beneficial post, nothing educational today. hehe! Yes, I like to lecture people about things, it's just me. Have a good evening ahead everyone! Thanks for reading my post and remember to write something in the chatbox or comment!

You just don't know when you hurt me, do you?

Love Rachel* 

Wedding Invitation Remix

How is everyone today? Tell me about it! Other than my terrible headache and my uncomfortable-ness, I guess I had an okay day! The last two periods for English we had to write a wedding invitation for fun and the whole class did an invitation for Ms Chow's wedding. I actually had a lot of fun writing it with my group! Came up with the funniest things! You all should read Saffron's Science poem, it's genius! Hope I can take a picture of all the hilarious stuff the class wrote! (:

I just got back from my ballet class, my toes hurt like sdfghjmpolkjhnbwfghj (in my language it means very very very painful) My blisters are going to appear soon enough. I really dislike it when people think that ballet is just a bunch of girls in tutus and spinning around with their hands above their head. Well, let me tell you that you are wrong! Okay, maybe we do spin around with our hands above our head but it ain't easy. Many people think that ballet is so easy but it's not okay! You need a lot of leg muscles, flexibility, strong enough to handle the pain when you go en pointe (I will further elaborate on that later), arm muscles, stamina and so on. I just want people to know ballet isn't as easy as it seems and I want people to respect ballet as a type of dance and sport as well.

Soft shoe. Normally used in lower grades.

Demi pointe shoe. It looks similiar to pointe shoe because it's a bit rounded at the end. Used in the higher grades. It's suppose to help you point better. 

The most evil shoes of all. You have to stand on your toes and yest it hurts like mad. Used in higher grades.  

That used to be me in class! Hanging on the bars but now I am too fat :b 

If you think ballet, let me see you do this en pointe 

Source: weheartit.com

Amazing, ain't it?

Source: http://sexygeek99.tumblr.com/

Under all that grace and beauty, you get this. 

Nothing much about my day I guess but the week is coming to an end! Woots woots! Are you all excited? Because I am! I just can't wait for Sunday but in the mean time, I have loads of work to finish up ): Really sucks being the organiser for certain things sometimes but it's for experience (: I hope you all had a good day! (:

Fly away....
Love Rachel*

Back to Strangers

I'm feeling very sick and not happy.. I'm just not in the mood for anything. I just need to talk to the right person. I just want to crawl under my blanket and sleep until I can sleep no more. I won't be talk about my day today so I'm just going to type out a poem that is related to my title.
Here goes nothing: 

I see you walking along the corridors, 

But we only say hi and nothing more.

I watch you as you walk away from me,

Watch until there's no more of you I could see.

There you are crying to your friend,

But you forgot I could always lend you a hand. 

When I see you smiling like a happy bee,

I forget that it wasn't because of me. 

Remember the memories we made with each other?

They are now floating away like a little feather.

Remember the smile you made me wear all the time?

My face is now as sour as lime.

Just thinking about you makes me weep,

Our times just keep haunting me in my sleep.

Letting you go is only the right thing to do. 

But do you ever want things to be like how it used to?

I see you have moved on already,

Being happy, strong and steady.

All the time you made me feel like a fool,

finding out I meant nothing you you.

In one lifetime the both of us had something,

The word "Strangers" to us meant nothing. 

I am no longer what you want,

so our friendship goes back to level one. 

That's it, goodbye everyone. 

Love Rachel*

The Chair

Jennifer Lawrence is hot. Yes?

Source: http://jenniferlawrencedaily.tumblr.com/

Hey y'all! Sorry for the late update, I totally forgot about my blog because I was caught up with so many things ): Not many people read my blog anyway, but to those who read, thank you so much. I really appreciate you coming to my blog EVERYDAY to read :D

So how was school? It sucked? Well it's only the beginning of the week so I suggest you hold on, like what I'm doing. I'm always looking forward to Sundays now, it's my only free day if you exclude ballet in the morning /: Sucks to the max... Time for  Rachel's Guide to Deal with a Sucky Week!

Advice #1
Be positive the whole week through. Everyday, think of how the day will be good and it will be good. The mind does affect how your life will become, you just don't know that. From there, you will actually enjoy your days and not worry about how many days are there more until the weekends.

Advice #2
Keep yourself busy. But if you're already super busy, just keep doing but for those who are super bored at home and are dreading for the weekends to come. Try to maybe start a blog or do something beneficial during your free time. You not only keep yourself busy but gain some good out of it as well. The more busy you are, the faster time passes. It's true. Trust me. 

Advice #3
Pretend that the weekend will never come. You should think that, "Ah crap, the weekend is never coming." When this thought occupies your mind, it makes you not bother about bothering that the weekend is coming at all (Makes sense?) And when you don't bother, the weekend is finally here! You would then be thinking, "Oh wait, I thought the weekend was never gonna come but now it's here. Woohoo!" (Sounds cheesy I know) 

Ridiculous advice but it helps me a lot because I am always longing for the weekends. Maybe you should try my method but if it doesn't help, you can come ask me :D Or if you have any better suggestions just let me know! Additional information is always welcomed :D I'm not going to talk about my day because nothing interesting happened but a cat did poop all over our class today. It's gross, just thinking of it makes me sick. Who in the world POOPS and WALK at THE SAME TIME! Jeez! Can't they just poop at one spot! Stupid cat. (I have nothing against cats, just pissed at the one that pooped in my class).

I try to do something about it but it never works. And I thought our friendship was too perfect.

Love Rachel* 

Right or Wrong?

Monday tomorrow, BOOO! Well boo for you but it's kinda my favourite day of the 5 school days, you know why? It's cause I like my timetable on that day and I have no training! Woohoo! It's my relax day, deal with school and come back home. That's the life I need. Just relax and get fat, heh :b 

I love this gif.

Source:http://reactivating.tumblr.com/

So how was your day? I don't care. Kidding. I do care. Anyway, I went to the cemetery this morning to "pray" to my relatives who passed away. I was looking at all the tombstones? I'm not sure what you call those but you get the point. There were two boys who were born in the year 1997 and passed away at 2007. Tragic ain't it? They were gone so young, at the age of 10... They won't be able to know more, see more and experience more. It's just super sad. This shows how fortunate we are, still breathing and living. You just don't know when you'll die. It can be anytime, you can die in your sleep *touch wood*, get hit by a car *touch wood* etc etc. I'm not cursing any of you but you all understand what I'm trying to say right? Why not just make the best out of everything while you can because you just don't know when you'll stop living. Death is a scary thought, it comes whenever it wants to. The lesser your appreciation towards life, the sooner death will come to catch you. Again, I'm not trying to scare anyone but think about it. Don't you think it's kinda true? You should give a deep thought about it. As they always say YOLO meaning you only live once (: 

Moving on, I went to Empire to get some groceries and had lunch. Let me tell you this, I never have lunch on Sundays because we normally have heavy breakfast. But my third sister was hungry (as usual), she kept saying she wanted to eat and my mum who always spoils her agreed to it. So I had lunch which made me feel uncomfortable because I wasn't use to it, haha. I'm feeling pretty moody this evening because of my mum. Don't get me wrong, I love her and I don't have mother daughter issues. It's just that I told her I was sharing with her that I getting involve with something and it annoys me that she's involving herself in it. I just feel like telling her, "Mum, please just let me do it by my own and stop trying to get involve." If I do tell her that, she'll probably get moody so sometimes I just keep it to myself. Bleh, hate my mood swings. School tomorrow, it's almost 9am. GO SLEEP. Remember to drop something at my chatbox or whatever (: 

Goodbyes. 

Love Rachel*

Lesbians & Japanese food

Love her dressing, awesome vintage picture.

Source: http://intensifyit.eu

Hello readers! Had a good day? Yes? Well mine sucked. Actually I dislike every Saturday because it's my busy day. Why is it a busy day? It's because in the morning from 9am-11am I have gymnastics, 11am- 1.30pm I have cheerleading, after that ballet from 4.30pm- 6.30pm, sometimes it starts at 3.30pm. I envy the people who gets to sleep in and do nothing the whole day. I want that ): Sigh, but again, I got myself into this so I have to deal with it. Hate Saturdays. So now you all know Saturday is my busy day!

I'm sorry I didn't update yesterday because I went out with my best friends and family and got back kinda late. Mummy brought us to Jogoya, my god, super duper expensive, it was like RM 110++ per person. To me it's really expensive and you guys have no idea how much my mum spends on our sports activities and education PER month. Felt guilty but as long my mum's happy, I'm happy (: After dinner, we three idiots went up and down the lift, it was fun but I got super dizzy and dead tired after that.  Had a good time with my friends playing the Slender Game. We first watched the reaction videos on Youtube and we were like "it's not bad, seems quite okay" but then when we started the game it was like "HOLY SHIT!" The game is scary because of the suspense and you don't when Slender man is going to appear. On my opinion, that game is shit scary but you guys should try it (: Feel the adrenaline, haha! OH! I got more polaroid pictures, yipee! (: I am probably going to start watching community because it's super hilarious :D Thanks Nadine for introducing it to us (:

I guess today's post is going to be quite short because I have nothing to say about today. If I do, I'm probably going to ramble on about how tired and lazy I was. We don't want that now do we? (: Oh! My friends have created their blog, go check it out!

Nadine: http://itsanapplepielife.blogspot.com/ I love the title of her blog, HAHA!
Sie Min: http://siemin-blinger.blogspot.com/ I love her headline picture, super cools.
Chen Yu: http://chennyu.blogspot.com/ I love how she bitches about people in her blog, HAHA! kidding, I love the font for her posts' titles.

If you have a blog, let me know and I can promote it for you (: Plus more blogs for me to read!

That's all folks! 
Love Rachel*